What the heart wants and what the brain says I need…..

Music: Coldplay (Shuffled Albums)

This way.....

If you have been reading through my blog (if you have thank you very much for the time and interest), you would know that I always have this urge to do research or community service. You see, I never intended to take up Sociology. No, Sociology is not Psychology, albeit they are of the same branch of science, they are totally different in a lot of approaches but of course there would be inevitable cross overs. I would love to explain further, but I would like to ask you to be a curious a little and find the differences of the two, believe me it’ll give you an insight or two. That gives you another opportunity to be smarter. =)

Anyway, filling up that college application was not entirely a breeze for me for the second choice (campus and degree for UPCAT). I was really dead set on getting in the Architecture department of any school. I applied for only three schools – that would be UST, UP and our local state university (in the province) Bicol University. My first choice was Architecture for all the three schools and never really minded the second choice. To cut the story short, I got admitted to two schools, UP and Bicol University (for Architecture). I got in my second campus choice, UP Los Banos - passed Sociology and got waitlisted for Food Technology. I never really knew much about Sociology like most people. I only associated it with Psychology like most people again. Only difference was, I tried to make sense of the word and tricked my mind that socio means society (which was actually right haha). I chose to study in Los Banos and dropped the dream of becoming an Architect in the province – for a better educational experience.

At first, I was just planning on using the course as a stepping-stone in the hopes of getting in the Architecture program in Diliman, but I fell in love with the place – Los Banos. I told my mom and siblings that I would continue studying Sociology not really knowing what is to become of me after college.

I did not only fell in love with the place to be honest but with Sociology as well. I had the chance to go out to different communities to conduct studies, surveys and developmental proposals, which allowed me to be more open to a lot of possibilities. Having a maximum of 21 units, which would mean 7 subjects for a semester and would also mean 7 research papers (or more). The love for writing – which I already did have back in high school, though no one really knew much about it, was rekindled.

In Sociology, I had the chance to study comedy bars, slums, farmers, group of students, a community, an ethnic tribe, a religion among other aspects in the society and it was really fun and fulfilling. At age 16, because of what the world of Sociology has given me, made me aim for any United Nations work related activities or volunteer program – which if you have been reading though this blog, is still a lifelong dream or could even be a dream for the next lifetime haha.

Watching documentaries, research and development activities, reading articles and even watching TV for any research and development related news make me think over and over and day dream that one day my chance would come.

You see, like what the title of this blog states, my heart really is for research and development but like anyone who has needs and dreams of a better life, sadly that dream is gathering dust. If you do not get grants, do not belong to a high paying community development organizations (mind you, there are really a few), life would be quiet hard. So usually my brain states the obvious, that you need to be in a world that would provide an income that could help you sustain the basic needs in life (okay include the family’s as well). It is really hard to compete with that. I love that there are researchers out there that stick to what is given to them and continue with the amazing work they do, but I have known a few that have actually left that world in the hopes of preparing for their future because really, what you would earn there is meager (for most unless you are a high ranking official).

Most of us, graduates of Sociology either go into law school, in the corporate world (getting sucked up by corporatism), had masters in business, have a completely different job and sadly only a few who stick to the principle. Like most as well, when you say you have a degree in Sociology, they would ask what it is – and it is quiet tiring sometimes to keep explaining the same thing over and over.

I just really wish that I could still do research and write and provide solutions on the side-lines because when I see documentaries, there is this hope in me that flickers, my heart leaps so to speak that I could do something like that, that I could help provide solutions or even options on how to improve a community.

Probably one day, when I have completely fulfilled Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs – it would come for sure. “Self Actualization” is really important and this, the dream of joining a group to do research and development would always be that one piece of the puzzle.

On the side note: Let us not keep sitting on the sidelines, there are many ways to take the stage of life and there are always roles to play. One of which is the one thing you most like to do that can make you feel so complete and infinite even for a moment. 

This is the reason why you never really have to drink three cups of coffee on a Friday with a long weekend creeping in.


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